Achieve All Goals: The 5 Step Mindset Shift 

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change-your-mind-set“I wish…”

“If only…”

“It’s not fair…”

“Why can’t I….”

Just shift your mindset and you can!

If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.

-Maya Angelou

Is your mind caught up in negative thought patterns?  nothing-changes-if-nothing-changes-252x300

Life satisfaction begins with a positive mindset.

  • If you believe you are pathetic, guess what…
  • If you believe you will fail, you are destined to.
  • However…
  • If you believe you are powerful, you are!
  • If you believe you will succeed, you can!

Mindset is a way of thinking, based on a set of beliefs, that determines one’s behaviour, outlook and mental attitude.

Your mind is a powerful tool, fill it with positive thoughts and your life will start to change positively. 

Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by CHANGE.

                                                                            -Jim Rohn

What do you want? What do you truly want your everyday “normal” to be? Really think about it.

  • Maybe you want to start working out each morning before the kids wake up, and feel energized.
  • Or you have a weight loss plan you are considering;
  • How about an education or career plan that you have been thinking about? Put it into action!
  • Are you thinking you would like to travel more?
  • Or do you and your partner want to spend more quality time together?

new-mindsetIt is not an unreachable dream… a future plan.  Part of creating your “normal” for today is picturing it as a natural part of your everyday life now.  Visualize it, and master the art of living it now.  Be the energy you want to attract. Begin to live it, create your “normal”, your new reality.

Right now some of you are saying:

“Ya but, my life has been so hard.”  

“My circumstances don’t allow for the changes I want to make.”

“You don’t know what I’ve been through.”

MINDSET.

I, like you, have endured some struggles.

In the past 5 years, I have been widowed in my late 30’s, after 13 years of marriage (suicide as a result of PTSD); lost my dad to cancer; battled for my own life twice with two ruptured ectopics, and suffered the loss of those pregnancies; coped with the effects of our adopted daughter’s mental illness and the associated loss; and am currently dealing with the neurological illness that my thriving 14 year old has suddenly developed and is now affecting her athletic and academic performance; I have had to change careers; and more…  My struggles will not be the same as yours, and can’t be compared.  But we all have struggles.  It is how we choose to let them affect us.4fc6423507712f33a596b77fae2872e5

Make the choice to change your perspective and embrace today with positivity, despite the challenges and stumbling blocks, and always be grateful for the little things (a sunset, a puppy licking you, a baby trying to walk, a horse running through a field, the majestic mountains in the distance, a cup of coffee, a smile from a stranger…).

My life would not be as happy, fulfilled and wonderful as it is without gratitude and a shift to a positive mindset.

A positive mindset, gratitude, always remember that everyone has struggles, and it is how they choose to deal with them, that can create positive change; this is how I have achieved my goals, and chosen to live the life I am living.

Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.

                                                                                                               -George Bernard Shaw

What choices do you need to make to create this “normal”?

 

What actions do you need to take?

  1. Define your goal(s)
  2. Change your beliefs – from negative thought patterns to positive thought patterns; “I am worthy of this”; “I am deserving”; “there is time”; etc
  3. Think positive thoughts – “I can do this!”
  4. Identify fears and potential obstacles – “I will not succeed”; “I have failed in the past”; “I will not have the support of others”; “I do not believe in myself”; “I cannot stick with anything”; etc
  5. Practice gratitude – be grateful for what you do have, and each step that you do accomplish toward achieving your goal and shifting your mindsetmindset-shift

 

To achieve goals and live the life you want to live, you don’t need superhuman strength, or the ability to time travel or wall crawl like Spiderman.  All you need is to change your mind. Sounds pretty simple really, doesn’t it?

 

 

With Positive Thoughts for your Mindset Shift,

Krista

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


I Found It… The Secret To A Happier Life

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If I said I found the secret to a happier and more fulfilling life, and it is an effortless habit, that takes only minutes a day…

Would you be interested in knowing what it is?

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It can:

  1. Lift your mood
  2. Increase motivation
  3. Help you focus your time and energy on the things in your life that you really want to “live with intention
  4. Not allow you to take things for granted
  5. Lift your spirits; experience joy, even in more difficult times

thG4IX9KVM    Have you guessed yet? (here are a few more hints…)

  • Focus on what is already here, what already surrounds you
  • Focus on what you can be grateful for in your life

Focus on GRATITUDE EVERYDAY, throughout the day!

That’s right… it is GRATITUDE!

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Gratitude fosters happiness, and doesn’t everyone strive for happiness?

To cultivate both gratitude and happiness:

Pause/Breathe:    simply pause throughout your day, a brief pause, and ask yourself the question –  What or who can I be grateful for today, in my life? 

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Enjoy the View:    look around you throughout your day, and appreciate and acknowledge your surroundings, be grateful for them (the beautiful sunset, the laughing children, the cute puppy, the majestic mountains)

Be Insightful:    improve your self-esteem and self-confidence by being appreciative of yourself.  Make a habit of identifying things you can be grateful for about yourself each day (you helped someone out, you made a good decision, you met a goal, your sense of humour was spot on today)

The Little Things:    look for the small daily things you can appreciate, the things you may take for granted (your lunch, your dog welcoming you home each day, your car getting you to work each morning, the pen that allows you to write your thoughts/lists)

Timing is Everything:    You will learn to recognize and acknowledge gratitude all the time, before you know it! But until then, it helps to set aside 1 minute in the morning each day or 1-2 minutes in the evening, before bed, and use a journal or Gratitude Box

IMG_7189  GratitudePinterestLI   gratitude-journal--225x300  (see: New Years GRATITUTIONS (Part II) for some great ideas!)

Yell It From the Rooftops:    You can’t keep all of this gratitude bottled up inside! You need to express it! You are grateful for all that surrounds you and you are happier, so let others know you are grateful for having them in your life – make them happy as well!

So there you have it! The secret to a happier and more fulfilling life:

GRATITUDE!

Happiness isn’t about finding something new, it is about focusing on what is already here, and appreciating it, being thankful for it.

Gratitude turns what you already have into enough.

You can always choose to be grateful, which in turn, means you can always choose to be happy.  Think about it…

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With overwhelming gratitude for my multitude of simple life blessings, and in happiness,

Krista


#happiness (How can I get some of that!) Part I

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#happiness is one of the most popular hashtags around right now. Makes sense right? Whoever doesn’t want happiness in their life say “I” (room goes silent now). But the question is…how do we get this thing called happiness? How do I summon this greater power throughout the day? Let’s examine.

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First of all, what is happiness? That is a loaded question, so let’s start by looking at one happiness researcher’s definition. In her book The How of Happiness, positive psychology researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky describes happiness as “the experience of joy, contentment, or positive well-being, combined with a sense that one’s life is good, meaningful, and worthwhile.”

OK, so where does happiness really come from, and how does it mysteriously appear? Some scientists have said that it arrives as a reaction to outside events, the events that bring us joy. While other scientists discuss it as being an inside job (it is conjured up from within ourselves). I believe that it is something that arrives from within ourselves. Sure, it seems like an outside event is the trigger, however the exact same outside event can mean different things to different people. It’s intentional activity that’s really important here; it’s how we choose to create or do an activity, and ultimately our response to it. Think about it – a simple thing could seemingly cause one person to be unhappy while another person could be joyous. The event is exactly the same. It’s our reaction to the event that can be so different.

In fact, according to research, approximately 50% of our happiness is accounted for by genetics, 10% by life circumstances, and 40% by intentional activity. The 40% intentional activity is what we should focus on changing, and I will discuss some ways to do this shortly.

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Now what about “joy”, how does this relate to happiness? We are all well aware of the moment-to-moment times of joy that seem to arrive from external things, like when we see a baby smile or a tail-wagging happy puppy. But have you seen the popular movie Inside Out where we learn from the character named Joy – that real happiness involves a suite of emotions including sadness. Yes, you saw that correctly, sustained happiness will include times of sadness, believe it or not. Happiness is not simply a constant euphoric state without negative emotions included along the way. Unhappy emotions like anger, fear, and sadness are quite normal, and at times, appropriate. If we continually set a high bar for happiness, we can become disappointed when we don’t meet that bar. An acceptance of some “negative” emotions is ok.

So happiness – how does it appear and continue with us along our journey called LIFE? This is a question many of us talk about and, we at Embrace Life have often wondered about this illusive word too. So let’s get to it…here are two ways of conjuring up more happiness in our lives:

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1. Practicing “pro-social” qualities like human connection, gratitude, and compassion, etc. Some examples of this could include practicing “Three Good Things” (or you could even try One Good Thing)”. Practicing Three Good Things involves, on a weekly basis, writing down three things good that happened in your life. This activity reminds us to seek out and savor positive things. This could include our connections with our friends and family, or considering how grateful we are for little things throughout the week. Regularly practicing pro-social qualities can help us feel more connected to others and connecting to something higher outside of the self. Check out this fantastic 12 minute TEDtalk on an exciting 75 year Harvard study on living the good life. The #1 thing learned in this study is that good relationships keep you happier and healthier….period! The quality of your relationships really matter, not necessarily the quantity. Good relationships with family, friends, and community are what really matter. And besides general happiness in life, there are many other benefits as mentioned in the video.

2. Mindfulness and awareness. Be present. In an article on Mindfulness , well-known mindfulness guru Jon Kabat-Zinn discusses how to cultivate mindfulness as follows: “although mindfulness can be cultivated through formal meditation, that’s not the only way. It’s not really about sitting in the full lotus, like pretending you’re a statue in a British museum,” he says…“It’s about living your life as if it really mattered, moment by moment by moment by moment.”

Here are a three key components of practicing mindfulness that Kabat-Zinn and others identify:

• Turn your mind to your breathing, really noticing it, especially when you’re feeling intense emotions.

• Notice what you’re sensing in a given moment, the sights, sounds, and smells that ordinarily slip by without reaching your conscious awareness.

• Recognize that your thoughts and emotions are fleeting and do not define you, an insight that can free you from negative thought patterns.

Mindfulness is important in that it includes awareness. Self-awareness – we can’t be authentic without being ourselves. And we can’t be ourselves without really knowing ourselves. Therefore, being authentic all starts with self-awareness. Consider being more aware of your reaction to words and actions, be it positive or negative. Try pausing for a second before a reaction to anything, and generally pausing from time-to-time in your everyday life. This gives your prefrontal cortex time to access a more positive road to take in your reaction to anything, be it positive or negative. Consider Gandhi’s famous quote:

‘Happiness is when what you think, say and do are in harmony’

Personally, I have found meditation to help with taking pauses at opportune times, and for thinking things through with greater clarity and purpose.

So there you have it in a nutshell. Practice the above and we think that you will see a difference over time. We are making strides to practice these things too – and we really hope that you will try this too. We would love to hear how it goes!

Stay tuned for Part II of this Happiness blog where I will discuss further happiness actions to include in your daily routine.

Kevin


New Years GRATITUTIONS (Part II)

wisewords_bannerNew Years’ Resolutions have a reputation for setting you up for failure more often than not… When I did a Bing internet search for “failure+New+Years+resolutions” it returned 18,000,000 results!  Can being grateful everyday have the same failed outcome?

There is a difference between setting a goal (resolution) just because the earth will begin another rotation around the sun, and your calendar starts on page one… and practicing gratitude everyday because, “Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.”  – Eckhart Tolle

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If your goals for the New Year were the most common New Years’ Resolutions, for example:

  • to help others, be more generous and kind
  • live a healthier, more fit lifestyle, lose weight
  • pay off debt
  • get better grades in school
  • quit smoking, quit drinking

Gratitude would help you to achieve these and more.  

Gratitude, according to the “What Good Is Gratitude?” (infographic) makes us:

  • more giving
  • more community minded
  • healthier
  • make more money
  • have stronger relationships/friendships
  • perform better academically
  • make better choices, regarding addiction
  • live longer

Do New Years Resolutions provide these benefits?Can you achieve Resolutions successfully without gratitude?  No.

So, let’s then begin to refer to resolutions and Gratitutions and provide a frame of success and encouragement to achievement of goals each year!

As each New Year begins, how do you recognize it if you are celebrating the things you are grateful for from the previous year, and then creating an action plan for gratitude for the New Year?  If you aren’t setting new goals, as some choose to do, many unsuccessfully, with resolutions, on January 1st, what will you do instead?

GRATITUTIONS Examples:

Gratitude Jar

On New Years Eve or New Years Day gather with your family and/or friends and create Gratitude Jars.

Once a day, several times a week, once a week (on a Sunday, perhaps)… you decide… write what you are grateful for and place it in your jar. The following New Years Eve or Day, gather together and read all of the things you were grateful for throughout the year.  Then , start your jars again the next year with a celebration of gratitude, and continue to practice GRATITUTIONS!

Gratitution or Gratitude Box

FullSizeRender (5)  It’s a Gratitude Jar, but in a box!IMG_7177

This is what we did this year as a family,with a few of our daughter’s friends, on New Years’ Day.

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Gratitude Journal

Similar to the Gratitude Jar, just a different format…  It’s a book instead of a jar!

You can write in a Gratitude Journal every day or once a week.  You can list three things you are grateful for, or you can write a story. This is your journal.  Again, just as you do with the Gratitude Jar, celebrate GRATITUTIONS on New Years Eve or Day with family and/or friends, each year!

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Be creative and create your own!!!

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So what is the benefit of Gratitutions versus Resolutions?

New Years Resolutions focus on what you do not have, what you have not yet accomplished, failures… each New Year.

New Years Gratitutions focus on what you already have, what you are grateful for from the previous year, and how you can continue to build on that successfully and positively to achieve new goals each New Year. 

Which one do you choose to ring in the New Year with this year?  I know which one I’m choosing… the soon-to-be-famous, GRATITUTIONS!

Wishing you a joyous 2016 and a New Year filled with an abundance of gratitude!

Krista

 


New Years “GRATITUTIONS”… Forget Resolutions (Part I)

This New Years, instead of making “resolutions“, why not change it up and make “GRATITUTIONS“?

What are gratitutions, you ask?  Well, first of all, let’s be honest, I made up the word… but it will soon be famous, I’m sure of it! 

New Years Gratitutions are a soon-to-be tradition. You reflect on the things you are grateful for from the past year, and create an action plan for gratitude for the New Year; rather than setting new goals, referred to as resolutions.  Why, you ask?

  1. Gratitude makes sense of your past, provides peace for the present and creates a vision for tomorrow
  2. Gratitude allows you to reach more goals, because your outlook changes and opportunities seem to open up everywhere
  3. Gratitude teaches you to appreciate the sunshine and the rainstorms, all of the ups and downs in life
  4. You can always choose to be grateful
  5. Gratitude turns what you have into enough and more

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The thing to understand about Gratitutions versus Resolutions is this:

New Year's Resolutions

New Year’s Resolutions, list of items

According to John Norcross (Journal of Clinical Psychology), approximately 50% of the population makes resolutions each New Year.  Some of the most popular resolutions are: quitting smoking, weight loss, exercise, better money management and debt reduction.

“Cultural Procrastination”, an effort to reinvent oneself; this is Timothy Pychyl‘s definition of resolutions.  As a Carleton University psychology professor, he believes that although people make resolutions as a way of motivating themselves, they aren’t usually ready to change their habits. Thus the high failure rate of resolutions.  New_Years_Resolutions

I believe unrealistic goals and expectations are another contributing factor. Discouragement from goals not being met as easily or quickly as anticipated can lead to old behaviours returning.

To change a behaviour, you have to change your thinking!

Gratitutions allow you to see only the positive by being grateful for things, big and small, hourly, daily, weekly…. If your mind is focused on the positive, and the abundance that surrounds you, it is much easier to achieve a goal!

Resolutions on the other hand, focus on the opposite, what you do not have, what you need, what you have not yet accomplished, what you lack, … this is discouraging and not conducive patterning to change behaviours over the long-term.  Hence, New Years resolutions are famously known to fail.

Focus your thinking on successes and how you can continue to improve upon them, such as with my proposed, Gratitutions. In order to create new behaviours and thought patterns, you must create new neural pathways in your brain to change habits and behaviours; do this in a way that allows you to be positive, present, and mindful.  Do not live in the past (except to build upon positive experiences for which you are grateful) or future. Be aware of your physical, mental and emotional present state, and pause and be grateful for it. Use gratitude as your encourager, and you can achieve anything!

Part II, New Years GRATITUTIONS, will delve further into the failure of New Years Resolutions, the benefits of Gratitude, and concrete strategies to embrace New Years Gratitutions!  I will post it in a couple of days 🙂

Be kind to yourself, practice gratitude, check back before the New Year for Part II!

With heartfelt gratitude,

Krista

 


Gratitude is a Choice… I’ve Made It, Have You?

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Do you find yourself in what feels like an uncontrollable downward spiral of misfortune, bad luck, resentment, failing relationships, emotional instability, pessimism, decreased self-esteem, or decreased energy?

Do you feel like things don’t usually go your way?

Do you frequently question how others can be so lucky?

Do you resent them for their good fortune?

Do you want to improve your physical health or reduce anxiety/depression through exercise or a better sleep routine?

Do you want to achieve a goal or increase your productivity?

Do you want to strengthen your relationships?

Even if you only answered yes to one of these, you can benefit from increased gratitude.

Gratitude opens the door to an abundant life! It turns what we already have into enough and more.

Over the past decade, researchers have really begun to delve into studying the benefits of gratitude.  These studies have documented the social, physical and psychological benefits, and these benefits are within reach to most anyone who practices gratitude, despite adversity.

To begin practicing gratitude, is a choice.

To make any change in your life is a choice.

Are you ready to practice gratitude? Are you ready to make this change? Then make the choice…choose to practice gratitude.

Unlock the fullness in your life and allow gratitude to create clarity for today and a vision for tomorrow. Gratitude allows you to see the positive through the negative, the calm through the chaos.

Begin to find emotional balance and happiness by simply acknowledging:

I am grateful for…

Choose to see what you already have as enough.

Open the door to YOUR abundant life!

 

Grateful for time to write about gratitude, as I sip apple cider in a cafe with my true love,

Krista

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


What Good is Gratitude?

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Gratitude: It’s a National Holiday… Check Your Calendar!

In North America, we recently celebrated Canadian Thanksgiving, Remembrance Day, Veterans’ Day, and now American Thanksgiving is just around the bend.  What do all of these celebrations have in common?  We express “GRATITUDE”.

On Thanksgiving, it is customary, to gather with family and friends and give thanks traditionally for the harvest of the preceding year and the many wonderful blessings and benefits we enjoy.

Remembrance Day and Veterans’ Day, both on November 11th each year, are memorial days observed since the end of the First World War to remember and honour the members of the armed forces who sacrificed their lives, and died in the line of duty.

GRATITUDE… One upcoming and three recent national holidays, on the North American calendar, that make us pause, take time out from weekly and daily routines, to remember and be grateful.

Do you take the time to acknowledge gratitude in your daily life when it isn’t on the calendar? Do you discuss thankfulness around the dinner table with family and friends more than once or twice a year? Think about it… how often do you reflect on the meaning of gratitude in your life?

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Have you ever wondered how important gratitude is to your happiness, well-being, your growth as an individual? Can anything new truly come into your life if you are not grateful for what you already have?

Henry David Thoreau may have said it best:

“I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving is perpetual.” 

‘Perpetual’… Thoreau’s gratitude occurs repeatedly; it is continual, neverending, sustained, relentless.

Gratitude can change your view of the world! It is that powerful! Gratitude can change negativity to positivity, sadness to joy, scarcity to abundance, and so much more. If we are simply grateful for who we are, and what we have, not only can it turn what we already have, into enough; but, it can also attract more good things to come our way.

Count your blessings.

Allow yourself to enjoy those blessings.

Set aside your complaints and be grateful for what you do have.

Stop looking for what is missing.

Life isn’t about always having everything you want… Want what you already have.  And be grateful for it. Always.

Remember, the things that you take for granted, someone else is longing for.

Be GRATEFUL everyday, not only when gratitude is on the calendar.         You WILL see positive change.

“Gratitude can transform common days into Thanksgivings;

Turn routine jobs into joy;

And change ordinary opportunities into blessings.”

-William Arthur Ward

With Heartfelt Gratitude,

Krista